Thank you letter (interview)

[RonBee]

Originally Posted by knowwhat

I would like to say that I enjoyed every moment of the interviews. From the 1st interview conducted by Ms. B, to aptitude test, then 2nd interview by Mr. A and finally my presentation, they offered me a good experience.

I would like to say that I enjoyed every moment of the interviews. From the 1st interview conducted by Ms. B, to the aptitude test, to the 2nd interview by Mr. A and finally my presentation, it was a valuable experience.

[RonBee]

Originally Posted by knowwhat

During the interviews, I am very impressed and admired with your unique leadership style and your in-dept knowledge of a call centre business. Your willingness to listen to my opinion, and provide me with feedback, base on your experience, to my opinion proved that you are people oriented, and concerned with staff development. Your concerned, while providing your feedback on my presentation, in the possibility of under resources (under staff), and the idea of incentive scheme in bid to motivate the staff confirm my understanding of your company

During the interviews, I was very impressed with your leadership style and your in-depth knowledge of a call centre business. Your willingness to listen to my opinion and provide me with feedback, based on your experience, proved to me that you are people oriented and concerned with staff development. Your concern, while providing me with feedback on my presentation, with the possibility of understaffing, and the idea of an incentive plan to motivate the staff confirm my understanding of your company.

Originally Posted by knowwhat

Above all, the sense of challenge, accountability, and responsibility of this position carries make it as one of my dream career.

Above all, the sense of challenge and responsibility this position carries make it a dream career for me.

Originally Posted by knowwhat

I am sorry that my performance fell short of your expectation during the presentation. However, I do admit I could have done a lot better.

I am sorry that my performance fell short of your expectations during the presentation. I could have done better.

Originally Posted by knowwhat

Last but not least, regardless the outcome of this interview, I am appreciated for the opportunity given for me to attend the interview. It is a really a value-added experience.

Originally Posted by knowwhat

Many thanks

Last but not least, regardless the outcome of the interview, I appreciate the opportunity given to me to attend the interview. It was a really a valuable experience for me.

Many thanks.

Much better!

[RonBee]

Originally Posted by knowwhat

During the presentation, I was given a task to improve a service standard of a call centre. I made some suggestions, but none of them related to staff (resources of the call centre). After I completed my presentation, the interviewers gave me some feedback and they said that the lack of staff could be the cause of the problem, and I should look it from more at staff prespective, e.g recruiting more staff and providing incensive to motivate them to work harder.

The use of the past perfect there is not necessary and is in fact inappropriate. Also, unfortunately, the second (revised) letter is not as good as the original.

[RonBee]

Originally Posted by knowwhat

Last but not least, regardless the outcome of this interview, I am appreciated for the opportunity given for me to attend the interview. It is a really a value-added experience.


Many thanks

Regardless of the outcome of the interview, I appreciate the opportunity. It was a valuable experience.

Many thanks.

[Tenor]

Just my two cents:

1. In a formal writing, '1st' is better to be 'first', '2nd' is better to be 'second';
2. Since you do not know the result yet, saying "my performance fell short of your expectation" sounds too modest.