[Essay] A/D: Technology desinged to make our life simply actually makes our life complicated.

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Vahid Azp

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That technology has either a positive or a negative effect in people lives is always a challenge point. People always talk about pros and cons of technology. In this regard, quite a few people would deem that technology is detrimental for life, but others, in contrast, believe that it is very useful and practical for everybody. As far as I am concerned, technology has great impacts on simpler life in that not only does it make works fast and easier, but also it causes to impose the high quality of life.
The first reason which should be mentioned here is that doing fast and quicker works is the most important role of technology in people lives. Technology helps people save their time and money. Indeed, using of technology is either time or cost effective. For example, nowadays, there are some universities in which are hold some online courses. So, students can participate in them without needing to commute between the university and their homes. Another example showing importance of technology is that individuals can transfer money by using Internet. Several number of money is transferred just in a few seconds through online accounts. It has a tremendous effect on urban life, especially in large cities, to reduce the air pollution and traffic problems.
Another reason which should be seen by everyone is that technology affects the quality of people lives, it promotes to high level of it. There many high tech facilities which use for many purposes. For instance, some smart phones, besides that high quality of camera, can help to keep health by some applications controlling health of a person. Another example, latest conditioner of air both produce the air fresh and remove viruses which is existed in the air.
By and large, technology has a wealth of advantages for people lives. It helps them to do works in an easy and fast way. Equally important, it adds high quality to personal life. In the future, all people will admire technology because of making their life simply. That technology has either a positive or a negative effect in people lives is always a challenge point. People always talk about pros and cons of technology. In this regard, quite a few people would deem that technology is detrimental for life, but others, in contrast, believe that it is very useful and practical for everybody. As far as I am concerned, technology has great impacts on simpler life in that not only does it make works fast and easier, but also it causes to impose the high quality of life.
The first reason which should be mentioned here is that doing fast and quicker works is the most important role of technology in people lives. Technology helps people save their time and money. Indeed, using of technology is either time or cost effective. For example, nowadays, there are some universities in which are hold some online courses. So, students can participate in them without needing to commute between the university and their homes. Another example showing importance of technology is that individuals can transfer money by using Internet. Several number of money is transferred just in a few seconds through online accounts. It has a tremendous effect on urban life, especially in large cities, to reduce the air pollution and traffic problems.
Another reason which should be seen by everyone is that technology affects the quality of people lives, it promotes to high level of it. There many high tech facilities which use for many purposes. For instance, some smart phones, besides that high quality of camera, can help to keep health by some applications controlling health of a person. Another example, latest conditioner of air both produce the air fresh and remove viruses which is existed in the air.
By and large, technology has a wealth of advantages for people lives. It helps them to do works in an easy and fast way. Equally important, it adds high quality to personal life. In the future, all people will admire technology because of making their life simply.
 

teechar

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There's no doubt that technology has [STRIKE]either a positive or a negative[/STRIKE] affected [STRIKE]in[/STRIKE] people's lives in many ways. [STRIKE]is always a challenge point.[/STRIKE] People always talk about the pros and cons of technology. In this regard, [STRIKE]quite a few[/STRIKE] some people [STRIKE]would deem that technology is[/STRIKE] focus on the detrimental impacts of technology, [STRIKE]for life,[/STRIKE] but others, in contrast, believe that it is very useful and practical for everybody. As far as I am concerned, technology has great benefits and is essential to having a [STRIKE]impacts on simpler life in that not only does it make works fast and easier, but also it causes to impose the[/STRIKE] higher quality of life.

[STRIKE]The first reason which should be mentioned here is that doing fast and quicker works is the most important role of technology in people lives.[/STRIKE] First, the use of technology means faster and more efficient processes in industry, agriculture and many other fields. Technology helps people save [STRIKE]their[/STRIKE] time and money. Indeed, [STRIKE]using of[/STRIKE] modern technology is [STRIKE]either[/STRIKE] both time-saving [STRIKE]or[/STRIKE] and cost-effective. For example, many universities nowadays offer online courses. [STRIKE]nowadays, there are some universities in which are hold some online courses. So,[/STRIKE] Students can participate in them without needing to commute between the university and their homes. Another example showing the importance of technology is that individuals can transfer money in a few seconds by simply using the Internet. This increased efficiency in communications and online business transactions has led to immense economic benefits. [STRIKE]Several number of money is transferred just in a few seconds through online accounts. It has a tremendous effect on urban life, especially in large cities, to reduce the air pollution and traffic problems.[/STRIKE]

[STRIKE]Another reason which should be seen by everyone is that[/STRIKE] Furthermore, technology directly affects the quality of people's lives, [STRIKE]it promotes to high level of it. There[/STRIKE] and many high-tech gadgets [STRIKE]facilities which[/STRIKE] are used by people nowadays for many purposes. For instance, [STRIKE]some[/STRIKE] smart phones, [STRIKE]besides that[/STRIKE] not only provide high-resolution [STRIKE]quality of[/STRIKE] cameras, but also enable people to use apps for an incredible variety of purposes ranging from playing games to apps that monitor health. [STRIKE]can help to keep health by some applications controlling health of a person.[/STRIKE] Another example of modern technology is the latest air-conditioner [STRIKE]of air[/STRIKE] which both produces cold air, [STRIKE]the air fresh[/STRIKE] and removes viruses and other germs at the same time. [STRIKE]which is existed in the air.[/STRIKE]

By and large, technology has a wealth of advantages for people's lives. It helps to make work easy and efficient.[STRIKE]them to do works in an easy and fast way. Equally important,[/STRIKE] It also adds high quality to personal life. I believe that technology will continue to bring benefits to people's lives in the future. [STRIKE], all people will admire technology because of making their life simply. [/STRIKE]

I advise you to use simpler clearer language in your writing. :)
 

Vahid Azp

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Hi dear teacher.
I want to attend in TOEFL, and I need complex structures, but I am disappointed with my essay. Is that awful ? :(
 

teechar

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I need complex structures
It's much more important to write clearly than to try to impress the teacher/examiner with unnecessarily complex writing.

but I am disappointed with my essay. Is [STRIKE]that[/STRIKE] it awful?
Don't be disappointed at all! Your essay is not awful. Learn from your mistakes and consider the advice I gave you.
You're welcome to post more essays to the forum, and we'll comment on your progress. :)
 

emsr2d2

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Note that "simply" in your title should be "simple".
 

Tarheel

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Vahid, please avoid using phrases that you have neither seen nor heard. People will not understand you. (I have never run across "challenge point" before.) Instead, use something that is already in use and that people will understand.
:)
 
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