Is 'which are' needed after companies for balance?

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bertietheblue

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'Companies in the business of receiving deposits from the general public and which grant loans must be licensed as banks.'

I often see structures like this in the documents I proofread. Do you think 'Companies which are ...' is needed for balance or is the above acceptable?
 

corum

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'Companies in the business of receiving deposits from the general public and which grant loans must be licensed as banks.'

I often see structures like this in the documents I proofread. Do you think 'Companies which are ...' is needed for balance or is the above acceptable?

First it should be understood that I am not a proofreader, but just someone who learns English for fun. The sentence is not ungrammatical, but stylistically poor, IMHO.

I would offer this:
Companies in the business of receiving deposits from the general public and [STRIKE]which[/STRIKE] granting loans (to them) must be licensed as banks.
 

Tdol

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It's acceptable to me.
 

Barb_D

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I do like the more parallel version but the original seems fine to me. If you're proofing, I'd let it go; if you're line editing, I'd make the change.
 

bertietheblue

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I've probably p***ed off a few lawyers over the years then, correcting this. Oh well!
 

corum

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I've probably p***ed off a few lawyers over the years then, correcting this. Oh well!

In the grand scheme of things, that is not the end of the world. :up:
JPN- CMR 1:0
 
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