rodgers white
Senior Member
- Joined
- Jan 17, 2016
- Member Type
- English Teacher
- Native Language
- Chinese
- Home Country
- China
- Current Location
- China
Hi everyone, are there any mistakes or repetitions in this piece of writing? Any help will be appreciated.
****************************************************************************
Before Gan could stop him, Yang was running towards Moogh, who trotted towards him too; Moogh nuzzled Yang with his big head while Yang patted and stroked Moogh in returned affection. Yang climbed onto Moogh’s back, and Moogh headed for the herd that grew nervous at the sight and smell of the human. JingYing asked Gan. “What’s Moogh doing”? Gan thought a moment. “I’m not sure, but, if I had to guess, I’d say he is introducing Yang to his herd, his wives”.
Weifeng, as promised, was helping Lanhua by carving the lines of Moogh and Yang deeper, her greater strength and experience doing the work much faster. Lanhua was asleep, exhausted after a day hard at work. Weifeng watched her sleeping, and noticed how like the mythical angels she looked, how angelic; smiling, she crawled into bed beside her, falling asleep almost immediately.
After circling and intertwining amongst his herd, Moogh trotted back to the others.Lili, Laohu, Gan and Jingying, crowded around Moogh, patting and stroking his head and body. Moogh tipped his head, and Yang dismounted. Yang was crying as he knew Moogh wouldn’t be coming back home and this was now his home and the herd his family. Jingying guessed his pain. “We, you, are still his family, son, just as you will still be ours when you eventually marry and leave us to make a home of your own.” Yang nodded through his tears. “I know, mom, I know”. The tears didn't stop for some time.
****************************************************************************
Before Gan could stop him, Yang was running towards Moogh, who trotted towards him too; Moogh nuzzled Yang with his big head while Yang patted and stroked Moogh in returned affection. Yang climbed onto Moogh’s back, and Moogh headed for the herd that grew nervous at the sight and smell of the human. JingYing asked Gan. “What’s Moogh doing”? Gan thought a moment. “I’m not sure, but, if I had to guess, I’d say he is introducing Yang to his herd, his wives”.
Weifeng, as promised, was helping Lanhua by carving the lines of Moogh and Yang deeper, her greater strength and experience doing the work much faster. Lanhua was asleep, exhausted after a day hard at work. Weifeng watched her sleeping, and noticed how like the mythical angels she looked, how angelic; smiling, she crawled into bed beside her, falling asleep almost immediately.
After circling and intertwining amongst his herd, Moogh trotted back to the others.Lili, Laohu, Gan and Jingying, crowded around Moogh, patting and stroking his head and body. Moogh tipped his head, and Yang dismounted. Yang was crying as he knew Moogh wouldn’t be coming back home and this was now his home and the herd his family. Jingying guessed his pain. “We, you, are still his family, son, just as you will still be ours when you eventually marry and leave us to make a home of your own.” Yang nodded through his tears. “I know, mom, I know”. The tears didn't stop for some time.