get married with/ get married to

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nicolewatson

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personally i would say "Tom is getting married along with Tim", as it still sounds odd otherwise, or maybe id say he's getting married at the same time as Tim....:)
 

fadysandy

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You get married with a hope, love and a song in your heart.
Why Men Like to Get Married With Asian Girls by Jenny Willston.
Get Married with a Las Vegas Train Wedding.
This happened to me when I get married with my high school sweetheart.







Back in the day, when people tended to grow up in the town they were born in, get married to their high school sweetheart, and land their first job.
Sooner or later the men who get married to the women they think they love will end up having to start over because that relationship will not last.
Do people get married to benefit the community? Why doesn't the state just consider it a private contract? Walker: &quot.
Dancergrl: You have to be really careful about who you get married to.
 

fadysandy

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Marry/ Get Married/ Be Married A lot of people get confused about how to use these words. Maybe this will help.
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]
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[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]
to marry (someone)
- this is the general verb. It is the time when people come together as husband and wife. Do not say I married with someone. It is not correct. And do not say I married to someone. It is also incorrect. [/FONT][/FONT][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct example: I married Sam 3 years ago.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]to get married- this talks about the time two people got married. It makes us think of the wedding.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct example: I got married.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]to get married to (someone)- We think of who was married in the wedding. Do not say I got married with someone. It is incorrect.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct example: I got married to Sam.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]to get married in (someplace)- We think of where the wedding took place.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct Example: I got married in Hawaii.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]to be married- This means a state of being. Are you married or are you single?[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct Example: I am married.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]to be married (to someone)- Also state of being. But who is married to you?[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Correct Example: I am married to Sam.[/FONT][/FONT]
[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica][FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica]Conclusion- When you use to marry or to get married, think about the wedding. When you use to be married, think about the person's life now.[/FONT][/FONT]
 

5jj

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personally i would say "Tom is getting married along with Tim", as it still sounds odd otherwise, or maybe id say he's getting married at the same time as Tim....:)

I agree.
 

MiaCulpa

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In my OPINION, one should say "married with", even though the accepted norm is "married to". Similarly, A long ago professor of mine made me aware that it was more polite to say "talk with" instead of "talk to".

I don't believe the two usages are parallel. The first, "married to," describes a reciprocal relationship that requires legal sanction, so "to get married to" simply describes participating in a ceremony that confers legal status.

"Talk with" vs. "talk to," on the other hand, raises the issue of whether two people are speaking to each other on equal terms. "Talk with" implies that they might be. "Talk to" implies that they may not be. A friend "talks with" another. A judge "talks to" a witness.
 

MiaCulpa

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It would make me cringe if I were to hear someone say "Get married with", and in the same vein, "Talk with".

It is bloody annoying because it sounds like self censorship stretched to the point of political correctness gone mad.

AmE is to blame as that is the main proponent of the "...with" usage.

Oh, dear, you sound rather annoyed, but I'm afraid you've been misinformed about AmE being the main proponent of the "with" usage. It is not common here. My impression is that when it is occasionally used, it is a mistaken attempt to parallel a phrase in certain marriage ceremonies that refers to one member of a couple being "joined with" another in holy matrimony. :-?
 

MiaCulpa

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What are the Americans taught at school?
I have the same question for the use of Present Perfect. As far as I know in AE it is very often, if not always, replaced by Past Simple.

I would appreciate if someone (a native) can answer these questions; I'm really interested in such differences.

I'm an American speaker and writer, and in AmE, the use of the Present Perfect tense is still taught in school and remains alive and well in general usage. It in no way has been replaced with the Past Simple tense, as you claim. The distinction regarding continuing vs. completed action is one which we Americans continue to find entirely useful, and it is a disctinction of which we remain keenly aware. :shock:
 

Tdol

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I'm an American speaker and writer, and in AmE, the use of the Present Perfect tense is still taught in school and remains alive and well in general usage. It in no way has been replaced with the Past Simple tense, as you claim. The distinction regarding continuing vs. completed action is one which we Americans continue to find entirely useful, and it is a disctinction of which we remain keenly aware. :shock:

I presume the person was referring to some uses of the present perfect in BrE where AmE and other variants, may use the past. Jumping from that to wondering whether it's alive in AmE is something of an over-reaction.
 

Johnson_F

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"Talk with" vs. "talk to," on the other hand, raises the issue of whether two people are speaking to each other on equal terms. "Talk with" implies that they might be. "Talk to" implies that they may not be. A friend "talks with" another. A judge "talks to" a witness.
For you, perhaps. For me, and for many speakers of BrE, 'talk (verb) with' is not very natural.
 

MiaCulpa

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I presume the person was referring to some uses of the present perfect in BrE where AmE and other variants, may use the past. Jumping from that to wondering whether it's alive in AmE is something of an over-reaction.

Perhaps, although I'd refer you to the original claim: "As far as I know in AE it [the Present Perfect] is very often, if not always, replaced by Past Simple." I was actually somewhat entertained by the allegation. My rhetorical hyperbole and my bug-eyed emoticon friend were supposed to convey bemusement that my countrymen and I were being so infamously characterized. (Ooops, there goes that hyperbole again). ;-)
 
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Johnson_F

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Perhaps, but I refer you to the original question. "As far as I know in AE it [the Present Perfect] is very often, if not always, replaced by Past Simple." My hyperbole and my bug-eyed emoticon friend were supposed to convey bemusement that my countrymen and I were being so infamously characterized. (Ooops, there goes that hyperbole again). ;-)
The person who wrote that was not claiming authority; they wrote, as you quoted, 'as far as I know'. They also wrote, 'I would appreciate if someone (a native) can answer these questions; I'm really interested in such differences.' The claim that this is infamous characterisation of your countrymen is indeed hyperbolic.
 

MiaCulpa

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The person who wrote that was not claiming authority; they wrote, as you quoted, 'as far as I know'. They also wrote, 'I would appreciate if someone (a native) can answer these questions; I'm really interested in such differences.' The claim that this is infamous characterisation of your countrymen is indeed hyperbolic.

Oops. I see what all the fuss is about. I thought I was still posting in the "Weird US English" thread when I first gave my response. I apologize sincerely to the original asker of the question for my flippancy and to those whom I may have perturbed with my inappropriate and mistaken attempt at humor in an "Ask the Teacher" thread. :oops:
 

Johnson_F

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Oops. I see what all the fuss is about. I thought I was still posting in the "Weird US English" thread when I first gave my response. I apologize sincerely to the original asker of the question for my flippancy and to those whom I may have perturbed with my inappropriate and mistaken attempt at humor in an "Ask the Teacher" thread. :oops:
Don't worry about it. I feel no need to apologise for my denseness in not noticing that it was an attempt at humour, so you certainly don't have to feel guilty about my densesness. The threads are a better place for humour, even if it doesn't always work for some. Carry on, please.
 

ssian

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What about get married 'off' :-?
 

5jj

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What about get married 'off' :-?
Not in the sense we are discussing.

The earl only managed to marry off his younger daughter by promising a huge dowry.
 
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Tan Elaine

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For you, perhaps. For me, and for many speakers of BrE, 'talk (verb) with' is not very natural.
Could someone confirm if it is true that "talk with" is not very natural in BrE? Thanks in advance.
 

5jj

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This British author mentions only talk to, although does mention talk with for 'some American speakers':

speak - talk - used with 'to' and 'with'

If you speak to someoneone or talk to them, you have a conversation with them,

I saw you speaking to him just now.
I enjoyed talking to Anne.

Some American speakers say speak with or talk with.


Sinclair, John [Editor-in-Chief] (1992) Collins Cobuild English Usage, London: HarperCollins
 

Tan Elaine

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Below are from Macmillan Dictionary and Longman Dictionary of Contemporary English respectively, both BrE dictionaries. They do not say that 'talk with' is AmE.

I would like to hear from BrE native speakers
.

Thanks in advance.

1. to have a conversation with other people
They were all talking and laughing together.
talk to: I need to talk to you.
talk with: Everyone was busily talking with their friends.
talk about: We were talking about you just last night.

2. Parents should talk with their children about drug abuse.
 
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Tan Elaine

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Could someone confirm if it is true that "talk with" is not very natural in BrE as stated by Johnson_F below although the dictionaries from which I quoted don't say it is the case?

For you, perhaps. For me, and for many speakers of BrE, 'talk (verb) with' is not very natural.

Thanks in advance.
 
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Johnson_F

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Could someone confirm if it is true that "talk with" is not very natural in BrE as stated by Johnson_F below although the dictionaries from which I quoted don't say it is the case?
Of course dictionaries don't list unnatural forms. They would be ten times the weight and size if they did.

So far you have had me, a speaker of BrE saying:
For me, and for many speakers of BrE, 'talk (verb) with' is not very natural. While nobody has appeared to say, "Of course Johnson is right, as always", nobody has yet disagreeed violently.

You had a quotation from Swan, a widely repected writer in BrE areas, giving only 'to' examples, and then saying that some American speakers use 'with'. You then found Macmillan and Longman who do not say that 'with' is AmE. (Why you want speakers of BrE to confirm that is beyond me).

If you like, I'll give you the Longman Dictionary of American English definitions of talk -"1. to say things to someone as part of a conversation", two quotations, one each for 'to' and 'with; "2. to discuss something with someone, especially something important", one quotation for 'with, none for 'to'.

Just what is it about my original statement, implicitly confirmed by Swan, that makes you so desperate for confirmation?

 
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